I wonder what percentage of first-time condoms are purchased, rather than being stolen?

Of course these days a lot of them are handed out by health clinics and other people who understand how the world works, but there wasn’t so much of that when I was new to them. I wasn’t even sure if I was allowed to buy them. I mean, if I got carded, what was I supposed to show them… my school ID? And even if I could buy them, I wasn’t going to take them up to somebody who reminded me of my mom to pay for them.

Nope, stealing them was definitely the way to go.

At the risk of stating the obvious: the background photo used here is not from 1990. There wasn’t a huge shelving unit full of them like this, just a single shelf between the razors and the tampons. Even so, on my earlier scouting expeditions, I had no idea which ones to get. Fortunately I’d seen enough porn to know that the “magnum” was not going to fit my pathetic little stick, and the “snugger fit” variety looked like a safer bet.